i often heard from friends, family, strangers.. that sacrifices will someday been look upon. but i guess they arent really right. humans tends to take for granted.

only when u start to lose something/someone deeply important to u. u den starts to cherish watever u have. i guess i'm 1 of those who dont know how to cherish. esp those who loves me. tats why nw i met someone who didnt noe hw to cherish me. time and time again.

sometimes i really dunno why. i just cant control my brain and mouth well. think alot, talk alot. think tat way talk another way. talk another way think another way. just dont link.

we're lack of truth, trust and thoughtfulness. we think the way we think it is and we argue to win. we continue to lie when we have already started it. i guess if i can handle this properly, i'll be having my own family already.

can i just have a 20 yr old girl mind and thinking's?

and i so so confirm tat immunity is really muz be build in u. by temporary really dont works. im not immune when im awake. i hurt myself to feel better. i cut i bleed i cry i bang i shout i hit to get better. im a sadist. why i just cant let myself lead a better life.

i try to be well controlled for everything. but i dunno issit opposite partner makes me lose control. im weak. family cant be there for me always. neither friends. i tends to stand alone.

___

at this very moment too

心里那眼泪 模糊了视线
你已经看不见